Tag Archives: space

Steampunk Bundle Teasers #4: In Which the Major Makes Good on a Deeply Held Personal Conviction

There’s only a few days left before the Steampunk Bundle disappears! In the lead-up to that heartbreaking moment, we’re running one more hot excerpt from the bundle. This is from 1901: A Steam Odyssey by Lionel Bramble.
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(also available at Amazon, iBooks/iTunes, Smashwords, Kobo and Barnes & Noble)

“There is one small problem,” the Captain said, as he took us aside. “My hull-repair crew is now using each and every pressure suit, save one. I shall have to ask the Major to make haste, to return so that Milady may the use it for her share of the necessary task. There is not a moment to be lost.”
“Nonsense,” I said, regarding the huge bulk of the roomy pressure suits, with their oversized domes. “The two of us will share the same outfit. The Major may look over my shoulder and supervise my movements.”
“Milady!” exclaimed the Major. “Such a thing has never been done. The strenuousness of the operation—”
“If I may boast,” I said, “there has never been a question of my fitness for physickal endurance. As to the issue of precedent, I daresay we shall shatter many records before we return to the Earth.”
How prophetic those words!
“Perhaps it might be done at that,” said our practical Captain, eyeing the bulky suit. “Bit of a squeeze. But it could be done.”
I said, “Captain, I take it the suit itself is sufficient to protect us from the vacuum and ionising radiation?”
He nodded in the affirmative.
“To make room inside the suit for two, we cannot allow our garments to encumber us,” said I, removing my jacket and corset and bidding the Major to do the same with his gold-braided blue uniform. “Come, Major—as the Captain says, there is not a moment to be lost. Unfasten those huge buttons!”
At this the Captain blushed. He represented a generation unprepared for the societal changes which accompanied our rapid technological process. I admit to feeling meanly amused by his embarrassment as I stripped off blouse and bodice and corset. I waited till he excused himself before I divested myself of bloomers, pantalettes, etc. and stood naked and shameless before the Major.
For the Major, I had no sympathy whatsoever. After we completed our tasks, I would have him. Or I would know why not.
“Given our shared body heat in the pressure-suit,” remarked I, “we are more than likely to perspire profusely. May I suggest, Major, that you remove that union suit? That’s it. And what is that you’re wearing under it? And there’s still more under that? Good heavens! Off with it, Major. All of it.”
It took some coaxing, but soon he was like myself, clad only in his skull and mermaid tattoos and his neatly matched piercings—and, I could not help but noticing, the rings like Saturn’s still stacked neatly about the root of his manhood. I was touched by this oddly sentimental gesture.
Yes, Reader, I did waggle my bottom enticingly in his face, as I clambered into the suit he already occupied. Now we both faced the same way, looking forward through the transparent dome of the great helmet. And even before I had slipped my legs into place before his, and leaned back into the muscled expanse of his chest, I could feel Saturn’s rings rise to greet me.
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